göteborg or “the non-budget trip”

a big part of an erasmus-semester is to learn how to manage and organize things in an unknown environment. with this in mind, we organized a trip to göteborg, and we started a whole 2 days before the trip! wow! surprisingly, everything worked fine online. car, hostel, route, ridiculous youtube videos, you name it, we had it.

so when mean-markus and i went to get the car on saturday at 8, we were expecting nothing but a perfect schedule. which worked pretty fine, except for one small little thing: they had no car for us. yes, the gas-station doesnt work with the website, and so they never received a booking. awesome, nice start. so, off to the next gas-station, because hey, maybe we got the wrong adress? nope. the website even gave us the phone-number of the gas-station they apparently dont work with. oh, and they dont work on weekends. of course.

so you can imagine the happy faces of the people when we arrived. beaten, lost, by foot. still, we managed to find another rental-car-place in linköping, they had a car, fuck yeah, lets do it. mean-markus and i wanted to be the drivers of the third car, since we already had 2 cars by awesome adrien and careful christoph.

everything worked fine, except that markus ISNT ALLOWED TO RENT CARS IN SWEDEN BECAUSE HE IS ON SOME BLACKLIST. what the fuck is a blacklist, and why is marlboro-markus on there? luckily, he didnt get arrested, and we just decided that safe-stefan aka captain cool aka me is gonna be the only driver. off we go! wrong, my credit-card didnt work. at this point, we just laughed. after offering our virginity to the nice cashier, we got the car. worth it!

so yes, we got a car, we loaded our stuff in there, we went on the road, high-fives all around.

first pee-break after about 20km. thanks to hilariously-small-bladder-hassan.

did i mention we had walkie-talkies? no? fuck yeah, we had walkie-talkies. all-knowing-adrien brought them. i salute you, french friend.

curious-christoph confused his kombi with a fighting-plane.

swedish people tune their cars too. even to an extent where they dont use tires anymore. sick stuff.

pee-break! but it was okay, the lake was nice.

look at it. its a nice lake. i didnt lie.

monkey-markus couldnt fight his roots anymore.

harnröhren-hassan needs pee-breaks during pee-breaks. pee-ception.

empty bladders, happy faces. “next stop, göteborg!”… yeah, sure.

handsfree-hassan and z..(fuck, what to rhyme with zlata? zigarette? zazumba?)-zlata, peeing, as i assume.

after just a few more hours filled with pee-breaks, shirtlessness, story-telling over the walkie-talkie and funny license-plates (KOK!), we arrived in göteborg. desperate-david was tired from sitting, so he laid down. why not.

confusion at the parking-ticket-machine.

“hehe, these suckers dont know shit about the good life.”

meaningful-markus likes waiting.

after some time that felt like hours, but most likely was even more hours, we went to the city. there was a dude, trapped in metal. also, with a crappy haircut. sorry, bro.

“get in the car, that austrian-egyptian dude looks like he will soon pee all over the place.”

you may have birdshit on your head, but at least your neck is warm. later on, one member of our gang will find out, that he was made to wear scarves. but not now. (thats how you build up suspense! i am genius with word-making on interwebs.)

swedish people are friendly and dont like aggression. but even if there was aggression, they wouldnt be able to fight. look at that gun. it wont work. never. also, its waaaay too large. stupid swedenians.

sinful-shveta telling stories.

“no, it wasnt dirty. look at me, i am so innocent.”

she isnt.

even though i didnt go to the zoo (next time, damn it), i saw some lions. and the smart swedish people caged him up. just imagine, a lion with a motherfucking sword, walking the streets. and crazy swedish people with non-working guns, completely helpless. it would be armageddon.

apparently, i should “respect” someones “hustle” more. i tried, i really hope i succeeded.

“this damn phone doesnt write messages. damnit.”

clowns, strange people, take a picture!

worst.cruise.ship.ever.

a pool on a roof. no big thing.

the germans, discussing if they did something wrong. they want to obey the rules.

they have houses and water in göteborg, i thought i could take a picture of it, nobody at home would believe me otherwise.

daredevil-david taking pictures. he is handsome, isnt he?

“that is a nice picture! let me take a picture of it!”

the old lady recognized dandy-david and realized it was röttig-time, so she fell to her knees. david didnt even look at her. he is that spoiled.

i just wanted to take pictures of the riesenrad, but they kept standing there, smiling at me. get out of my picture!

swedish life-guard.

danger-david, realizing its picture time.

the cation-crew, more than just lucky to be on a picture with rambo-röttig.

hands on a wall. only in sweden.

vikings, in göteborg.

sometimes, i am so artsy, i cant believe it.

BELIEVE IT.

cargo-cranes.

some punk scribbled something on the precious street. damn vandals.

its a picture of ropes.

mandatory-markus, sitting.

the cranes again.

devious-david. he is a serious thinker.

mar-kus, doing something spanish people refer to as “the pirate”. look it up. its dirty.

FIKA!

Dennis, the menace. happy. wait till you see him tomorrow.

i destroyed the muffin. with my teeth and my intestines.

thats all for today, the rest of this f****ing awesome trip follows.. tomorrow? the day after tomorrow? dont know.

depends on the weather. orange juice. my hats. the tides. cookies. and table.

i like lamp.

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